Preserving your Authentic Self

Authentic. Raw. Real. Are we really that magical without filters? Then why do we move away from the real self? Why do we feel the need to prove our worth to the world, without realising it and being comfortable just being ourselves? If it is our life, our dream, our purpose, we need to back ourselves with courage, relentlessly and consistently.

But it is definitely not that easy. We are all born authentic, but somewhere, along the way, the voice in our head starts mirroring external beliefs and observations. What our family, friends, peers and managers think of us starts colouring our mind. And our desperation to make it work sneaks in disguised as conditioning even before we know it. The friction reduces, the processes become smoother and seamless and we are happy that at least it is working. But we still do not feel happy or satisfied. In silent moments we reflect and feel something is amiss. So we fill up the spaces with shopping, media, entertainment or whatever else can help. Till we do not embrace our authenticity, we continue this pattern of denial.

So embracing is an approach, but not the milestone. Celebrating our authenticity is knowing ourselves and that is a journey, not a destination. In moments of strife, self-doubt, agony and frustration, we challenge our authentic selves again, especially when it is with respect to our high investment of emotion and time. So when we are challenged by our siblings, spouses, friends, managers, we lose ourselves again. Because we assume that they would understand and appreciate us commensurate to our deep investment. So misunderstandings, arguments, fights with people and relationships we invest in, actually bring out our worst selves. We build more walls than bridges. And we are left lonely and miserable.

This is where being authentic can help. You can acknowledge the hurt, the pain, the agony and the feelings, and release them. Held back emotions only add weight, not value. You can forgive yourself and others. You can embrace yourself and others.  You can learn and move ahead. You can let go. You can go back to being yourself, renewed and refreshed. Being authentic is not just being yourself, but finding yourself again and again, and preserving the best of yourself! Because a less authentic you, is not you!

#bestofyourself series

Alka Sharma. All Rights Reserved.